Wednesday, January 21, 2009

This is Why Vampires can Only Own Baseball Teams

The maple bat controversy has apparently reach something of a climax. This past baseball season we were treating to the spectre of the maple bat. The maple bat is a fiendish devise designed to shatter with the force of three claymore mines, delivering blunt and edged weapon attacks and killing all in its path. Which is to say, I like the hickory and birch kind better.

I have to say, I am in something of a quandary. On the one hand I do not think there is any question that the current state of affairs is, in fact, dangerous. Additionally, some of the steps Major League Baseball is taking (increased insurance, manufacturing guidelines) seem reasonable. On the other hand, this is Major League Baseball. By definition anything they think is a good idea, no matter how reasonable it might seem, is probably touched by the stench of brimstone. I'd rather not see anyone take a bat shard in the chest. Well, okay, that's not true. In fact, I have a list. (In other news, future Hall of Famer Jeff Kent is apparently about to retire.) However, I would rather not see random people injured.

I am just not certain that MLB is the most qualified organization to prevent these potential injuries.

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